Hello World,
Today I am going to talk about the MASK of DISGUST. As a young child, my father worked with me a lot to learn to cope, regulate my emotions, defend myself with my fists and words, but he also taught me to take the power away from people who were trying to get me to be inappropriate for their own laughs. Once I mastered this, I loved the POWER it gave me because anyone who thought I was incompetent ended up having to wear the MASK on their face in front of me. To me, this was my reward for just being myself, each time this happened it only EMPOWERED me more and more to continue being myself. I knew I was doing the right thing.
I am typing the word DISGUST in all capital letters for a very specific reason. Those who abused or bullied me and could never get the balls to do the right thing and apologize to me still have to wear the MASK on their face when they read, watch, or listen to my content, it is themselves being punished by themselves. This EMPOWERS me, because I know the impact of what I have shown to the world. I know a lot of people around the world know who I am. I know the impact I have had due to my position of standing up to both my abusers and the jackass who showed up to my house to murder me. I know it got attention, to me I know some those out there who are to small to apologize and are still wearing the MASK when they think of or see me. There are those who still carry the anger they have towards me because I am inappropriate when I want or need to be and they will always wear the MASK because of it.
It wasn't until I moved to Elko that I really started to have problems in the community with how I was treated by the public. Like I said my abuser would tell my friends and their parents to call me "Big Baby" and publicly ridicule me, this spread around the whole town. A lot of people off the bat knew that treating me that way was inappropriate and chose to treat me like a human. Some of the parents and friends would ask me what that was about and I would tell them my story, even the FACT she forced bleach down my throat. Those families would tell me I always had a place to hang out and escape to if I ever needed to flee my home.
There were those in high school that would try to treat me this way to get a rise out of me, and I would ignore them. They would get frustrated and get to wear the MASK as they walked away pouting and embarrassed in front of everyone else. This again EMPOWERED me. I eventually got fed up with being treated this way, a lot of people refused to believe I was cognizant and continued to treat me this way, they are called BULLIES.
I decided to send a message to my peers one day. In ninth grade, in Mr. Hugh's Science class we were in the lab. One of my bullies played on the basketball team under our "Coach K." This kid was maybe 5'6, skinny as toothpick, and had the body of a cross country runner. At this point I was 6 foot 2 inches and 170 pounds of lean muscle, played football and wrestled. The moment he opened his mouth I took his head and bounced it off the counter top in the laboratory like it was a basketball dribbling on the court. We were sent to the office where he started lying and making accusations, so I decided to come out of being non-verbal and said "No, he is one of my bullies and have been doing it since 8th grade." The look on his face was fucking priceless. He didn't know I could speak yet alone articulate myself. This was the same expression that everyone else had when they found out I was cognizant.
We both got a three day suspension from school for our behavior, and this happened on a Monday. My wrestling coach allowed me to come to practice everyday though and wrestle at the tournament the upcoming weekend. The bully got suspended for two weeks from basketball practice and games. I will say this about the bully, he quit bullying me. In fact he approached me one day and apologized for his behavior and owned his actions. I respected the hell out of him for that. The impact of what I did sent a message to my peers that I was cognizant.
There were plenty who still refused to believe I was cognizant, so some of them got more deceitful. Some would put in the work to become my friend only to set me up for pranks, which I was gullible enough to fall for. This taught me even more lessons in how to allow people around me. I ended up coming up with a system to allow people in my life because of this, and my friends would have to prove to me that they were loyal, that I could trust them before I would start joking around them or being inappropriate for laughs. This also led to even more EMPOWERMENT, because I learned to see the deceitfulness coming from a mile away, so I started thinking 10 steps ahead of everyone in any situation.
This helped me MASTER the tactic of always being myself and letting people think what they wanted to think about me. The BULLIES would only escalate their efforts but I was already at least 10 steps ahead of them. I would play along with them until a certain point and then set them up to be embarrassed in front of everyone around. They would eventually think they had me fooled and would try to get me to do something incredibly inappropriate in front a group of people and I would refuse. Their response was to try and use the "Big Baby" approach on me and I would call them out for their efforts to manipulate me and treat me that way in front of the crowd, and they would get the look of DISGUST, tuck their tails, and run away all while the crowd laughed at them, and looked at me in awe and cheer for me. This is how I made believers in me.
I learned to always be myself, and I would only be inappropriate around my friends, with the exception of a few jokes I would say in school, by the time I graduated there were only a few BULLIES left, but plenty still refused to believe I was cognizant. I ended up developing my ability to be myself more and more and allow people to see and think what they wanted, and then holding them accountable in a public forum. Those that apologized were good people and I am cool with them till this day. Those that couldn't handle the FACT that they lost to me went back in to their little snake holes to hide in.
I had a few bullies in the Marine Corps, but it was like 1 in 1000 and they got the same treatment, but because of our bond as brothers, we would make it right with a good night of drinking and developed comradery, there is only one Marine I have beef with till this day for how he treated me, and I made him wear the MASK all the time, he couldn't look at me with a straight face, could you, Bethany? For the most part everyone else treated me like a brother, had my back, and knew I would only be inappropriate for laughs, they got me.
After my time in the Marines I moved back home to Elko. There were a lot of fucking morons who still thought I wasn't cognizant. How could I make it through the Marines if I wasn't? I was trained in both the M16A2 and the M9. I had an MOS that required a very high ASVAB score and GT score. I had a secret clearance. I earned an Honorable Discharge after 5 years of service. I was selected and got orders for the prestigious Marine Security Guard position, which meant I would be guarding embassies, but I turned down the orders (they only accept volunteers for this MOS). because I was only a four hour drive from visiting my son, and he was just a toddler. I visited him often, so I didn't want to go overseas for three years. Even with all that on my resume, there were those in the town of Elko that still thought I wasn't cognizant and made efforts to play games with me when I was out in the public.
I would go to the bars, strip club, and casinos like everyone else. That is really all that town has for a night life for adults. I would go alone or go with friends, but there was always someone who thought they could get a rise out of me and would try to play games with me. My friends LOVED watching this happen. They knew what the outcome was going to be and it is pure entertainment when I flip the switch and hold them accountable in public. I can't count how many MASK I got to laugh at and EMPOWER me that I got from that town. Some would come apologize, and some would go hide in their snake holes.
Those that apologized I am cool with, those that couldn't handle the shame I am not cool with. I could name drop a lot of people who still live in that town, but that is not what this blog post is about. I think if I did that some of those fucking morons would come looking for me to try and murder me. That is the level of embarrassment and frustration I can make people experience, just look at jackass, he tried and lost. To this day even after all I have accomplished, I know there will always be people who can't believe I am cognizant and will try to test me. For the most part I ignore them, but I do like to feel EMPOWERED from time to time so I let them see what they want to see and think what they want to think, I am just being myself, they are the ones being INAPPROPRIATE.
The Masonic lodges I belong to treat me with the utmost respect, however some of the Shriners in Boise didn't realize I was cognizant, and shame on them. To be a Shriner you have to be a Mason. There were plenty of Shriners who would try and get a rise out of me and I would play along, because we were part of something special, and I thought I was around brothers I could trust, so I played along to make people laugh, but when I would refuse to play along, the MASK would show up. One of my roommates tried to point out that some of them were purposely fucking with me, and I told him that I knew, and I was letting them be them so I knew who not to trust and be around, the BIGOTS all just identified themselves to me. Easy peasy.
For the most parts the coaches I worked with were cool, some thought I wasn't cognizant, but they didn't treat me abuse me or try to get a rise out of me, the only one that ever did is identified in this blog post. I emailed the superintendent about him a while ago and then sent that post the other day and told them that they can do what they feel is appropriate, but told them that its not on me if your office gets blown up with phone calls and emails, but I would feel bad if it happened. My favorite coaches to work with was Bob & Shane from Elko and Gene & Wade from Boise.
I told the world when we all started this journey that I was going to hold people accountable for now on and if you didn't like it, don't treat people, especially those with disabilities with disrespect in public spaces in front of me, and if I find out about private abuse I'd make an example out of them too. My current project on X is to scroll down my feed and anyone I see disparaging people with disabilities or using the word "retarded" to attack someone and screen capture their post. Once I have enough of these post I am going to make a highlight reel for these people.
I want to be clear with everyone about something. If you were someone who tried playing games with me and apologized, we are cool. If you are someone who didn't think I am cognizant, we are cool whether you believe me or not. If you are someone who had to wear the MASK and had to hide in a hole, we are not cool until you apologize to me, I will still give you that opportunity, email me at thecoachrage@gmail.com. Side note hear, if you were one of the ladies that wanted to get frisky with me but believed the rumors, HELL even if you ever just wanted me or want me now, feel free to reach out, I will have to get the wife's permission, but it is a possibility, so is joining us in bed. LOL, don't be bashful!
Those of you who had to wear the MASK and still hate me, we are cool. I don't care if you hate me, but if you want to mature and become a better person, learn to treat those in your communities better and this includes yourself. Jokes are jokes, but playing games and personal attacks are not okay.
I don't carry hate and anger in my heart and I never have. I just do me and hold people accountable when I deem fit to do so. How you conduct yourself and treat people is on you. How you respond to your failed efforts is on you. I have had plenty of people try to accuse me of "tricking" them too. I don't trick people, I am just me, it's your fault if you choose to believe the rumors about me and act the way you do.
There have been plenty of people who took the time to ask questions and get to know me. Within the first five seconds you will know I am cognizant whether I am being appropriate or not, it is always funny to me for those who can't believe it, and then I know that I might get a chance to feel EMPOWERD and make an example out of someone.
Thank you,
Mikey